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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23060650">Secret Report X: Further Memoirs</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/QtPi/pseuds/QtPi'>QtPi</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Kingdom Hearts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Apprentice Lea and Isa, Pre-Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, Pre-Organization XIII (Kingdom Hearts)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 12:07:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,539</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23060650</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/QtPi/pseuds/QtPi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Saïx reflects upon his past before the Organization.<br/>A continuation of Saïx's Secret Reports from Kingdom Hearts 3.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>My piece for the Saïx Zine.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Moon Shine Down: A Saix Fanzine</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Secret Report X: Further Memoirs</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Heya! This was a bit of a different fic I wrote from the Saïx zine that recently came out.<br/>I must admit I was nervous as hell sending it off before and I'm still hesitant now.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>Excerpt 1</span>
    
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Lea and I were sitting opposite each other the night before, the quivering whispers of that girl echoed in our minds. The ghost of a cry for help. <br/></span>
  <span>‘If we can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.’ Lea had broken my trail of thoughts. My eyes snapped up to meet his, and so we devised our alternative method.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Still to this day, I’m not sure what possessed Ansem the Wise to actually recruit us. Perhaps he pitied us. He probably thought we were just eager,  but we were two foolish boys, nothing more. After a sigh and a slight roll of his eyes, Ansem offered us positions as apprentices. Like an excited puppy, Lea was already accepting on both our behalves; I couldn’t deny him though. I had promised Lea I would follow him to that girl. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Immediately we were given our uniforms that could just about fit on us; the sleeves covered our hands and we had to roll up our trousers so they didn’t drag along the floor. We were told by Ansem that we could roam the castle freely, however the basement was off limits. So much for easy access to our goal... After being given our rules – for which there seemed a lot more than anticipated – we were introduced to our fellow apprentices. I don’t think they were too excited to to see us, however Lea more than made up for it as he eagerly shook the hand of everyone, even the two guards we knew already. I felt my face burn up as I shook Dilan and Aeleus’ hands, remembering them picking us up and throwing us out into the gardens. Even’s handshake was so firm I felt the blood cut off in my hand, and Braig patted my back so hard all the breath in my body was huffed out like a balloon. What was most baffling was the little boy, Ienzo. To my surprise,  he was an apprentice too; they all took him under their wing when his parents disappeared. It was nice to see the hearts they had. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A final gentleman joined us a while later – he was tall, silver haired and wearing a lab coat the same as Even’s. When he didn’t mention his name, Lea and I asked for it. <br/></span>
  <span>‘Xehanort.’ his voice was a lot deeper than I expected, and the air he held himself up in was overwhelming. Looking back, I now understand why.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>Excerpt 2</span>
    
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While Lea was great company, I craved some peace and quiet; some time to collect all my thoughts and sort them neatly. As I walked freely through the castle without the fear of being caught – something I still found unusual at the time - I came across the library. I was in awe of the place; two levels full of leather-bound books, all arranged by colour. A regal staircase trailed up to the second floor in one corner and an elegant chandelier guided me through the labyrinth of bookcases. Amongst the tall shelves, I was drawn to a bright red book, the leather making the light shine off of it. Along the spine read the title ‘Report #13’. Carefully, I removed the book from its neat row and brushed the dust off of it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘And what do you propose to do with that?’ the voice startled me, and I dropped the book between my hands. Xehanort had caught up with me, slinking up behind without being traced, ‘Surely you must know to be careful around here.’ <br/></span>
  <span>‘What’s that supposed to mean? I’m an apprentice as much as you are.’ I huffed as I checked the book, checking to make sure it wasn’t dogeared. <br/></span>
  <span>‘Indeed,’ Xehanort put his hands behind his back and looked out at the nearby window, ‘I like your eagerness, it will be useful. But I’m afraid you will have much to learn before you get your fingers all over our research. You seem wise enough; your fire haired friend, however, not so much’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>My blood boiled as I shoved the book back in its place and looked up. ‘Mock </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span> all you want, but don’t you dare insult my friend. He’s smart in his own way, you’ll see.’ A pause, then a chuckle from the man.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>‘Adorable how you look over him. But you should know, boy, that a good scientist never lets friendship get in the way of his work. Keep that in mind.’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Xehanort walked up to me, and I realised how tall this man was. His shadow loomed over my head and his gaze pierced into my own eyes as he brushed past me, departing down the staircase.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>Excerpt 3</span>
    
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The second night in the castle, I was awoken by four loud knocks – Lea always knocked four times. I peeked out through the curtain to see the hint of dawn lighting the grey skies; it couldn’t have even been four in the morning. What on earth would have caused Lea so much concern as to wake me so early? Our plan had been simple; settle in as apprentices and deceive our superiors, then once we have them on our side, we would start infiltrating that basement and find the girl. Despite my bitterness, I knew that Lea must be worried about something, so I slowly got up to open the door. <br/></span>
  <span>‘Isa?’ a muffled voice came from the other side of the door. <br/></span>
  <span>‘Coming, Lea.’ my voice croaked out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Immediately I knew something was wrong. When I opened the door I was greeted by a pale face, Lea’s brows furrowed.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>‘I heard screams. From the basement.’ Lea’s voice quivered, and I grabbed his shoulder.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>‘Get dressed, I’ll meet you at your room in five minutes.’ I gave Lea’s shoulder one last reassuring squeeze before dressing into my baggy shirt and slacks. Putting on my coat as I got to Lea’s room, I knocked gently and waited for him. Once Lea was ready in his uniform, we carefully walked towards the screams, trying to navigate where the basement was. Hearing those screams was a sound I still try to shield from my memory; piercing and helpless.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With our arms linked, Lea and I warily approached a tall, splintering door. The screams seemed to seep through it, and each echo of her voice stirred an unease in my stomach. Swallowing down my fear, I looked over at Lea who was the palest I have ever seen him. A tear was welling in the corner of his eye and trickled down as he closed his eyes.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>‘I have to go in there and get her.. I-I can’t--’</span>
  <span></span>
    <br/>
  
  <span>‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>We’ll</span>
  </em>
  <span> go in there.’ I squeezed his shoulder and gave him a tight smile, as if that would make us feel any better.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>‘Y-yeah. We got this, right?’ Lea wiped his eyes and huffed out a breath before squeezing my hand. I took a deep breath of my own and opened the door.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>An infinite staircase spiralled, further and further down. The screaming had ceased once we had started travelling down. The light from the hallway disappeared as we lost ourselves more and more into the darkness until we heard a boy laugh. It sounded eerily like Even’s chuckle… but it wasn’t. As a figure started to emerge, the stairs under our feet collapsed. Clutching onto each other tightly, Lea and I fell to the floor that seemed to be right below us. The figure came closer, but as I tried to call its name out, a hand covered my mouth and Dilan picked me up. Aeleus did the same to Lea, and we both flailed and shrieked helplessly in their grasps as the boy approached us, Xehanort following behind him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Well done, Ienzo.’ Xehanort patted the boy’s shoulder, ‘Or should I say, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Zexion</span>
  </em>
  <span>”.’</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>Excerpt 4</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Whether those screams were an illusion of Zexion’s or real, I am still unsure. From talking to Lea, he is too focused on getting Roxas back at the moment. I saw him today at the Clock Tower in Twilight Town; just so I could say goodbye to him. By the sunset of tomorrow, one of us will be gone. Should all my plans come together, I hope it is I who will fade away. Lea says he’ll bring me back, but time will tell. After all, it requires someone to hold that much want in their heart for someone to return. After the things I did to Lea, I wouldn’t be surprised if I was the last face he’d want to see. However, since Axel disappeared and Lea returned, my axis had spun fully. When I tried to strike him down Where Nothing Gathers, he spoke my true name… A name I had not heard in a decade. A name that I had almost forgotten. Were it not for the burn on my face, I would have felt like the same person. Over time I’ve realised </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> was the puppet all along, not Xion. Parts of me aren’t even human, let alone myself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The dawn of our battle approaches, and as I spend my last night as an apprentice, I’ve come to a realisation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After being Xehanort’s inferior for too long, I’ve found my purpose again. It isn’t my strength, it isn’t Kingdom Hearts. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s</span>
  <b> Isa</b>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you enjoyed this fic, be sure to check out all the other works from the other incredible writers from the zine in this collection! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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